What drives a person to kill in cold blood? This is a question that never ceases to fascinate me. Reading about Kaal in his journals made me wonder if there is any limit to the monstrosity in this world. His story began in 1973 when he was born to Mr. and Mrs. Sameer Khan. Although his journals provided little information about his parents, the investigation later uncovered many details.
Chapter 5 – The Birth of a Serial Killer
— Anurag (@LekhakAnurag) August 19, 2024
What drives a person to kill in cold blood? This is a question that never ceases to fascinate me. Reading about Kaal in his journals made me wonder if there is any limit to the monstrosity in this world. His story began in 1973 when he was… pic.twitter.com/Wckjccu1Qu
His journals revealed their story in fragmented pieces, which made it easier to gather more information about him. Before I delve further, let me share a fact: out of 160 officers working in my department, it took 100 of them months of exhaustive work to dig deeper into his life.
Now, let’s return to Kaal. Born into a wealthy family, he was indulged with excessive pampering, fostering an “I can do anything” syndrome. During his childhood, he exhibited signs of mental health problems and regularly killed animals in and around his home. Initially, his father covered up his petty criminal acts with money and influence. However, his parents eventually realised something was horribly wrong with their son and knew it had to be addressed sooner rather than later.
His worried parents consulted a psychiatrist. Evidently, his psychopathic tendencies and killer instincts were apparent, and the way he lived his first seventeen years was far from normal. The parents, who believed he would improve with time, lived only to witness him become the worst of the worst.
His journey as a serial killer began on the first page of the journal. We found no records or journals prior to that. From the looks of the case, it seems that his psychiatrist was the one who suggested he write about his day-to-day experiences to better understand him. Thanks to this, we now had everything we needed to know about Kaal—or at least we thought we did…
Anyway, it’s best if I share what he wrote in his journals in his own words. This is Page One of Journal #1:
14 January 1990
I do not understand why I feel this way. Meeting a doctor every week to eliminate these urges is killing me. I want to get rid of that doctor, but it won’t be easy with them present at every session. I want to kill him just the way I killed Ronnie. Just smash his little head on the pavement and let him bleed. But according to them, I can’t do that to Dr Rastogi. Just because he’s human and not a rabbit? That’s not fair at all.
How can I tell them about the warmth I feel in my heart when I see life leaving the body of an animal? They struggle only to die faster. Initially, I loved killing them instantly, but it ended too quickly. Killing them slowly keeps them warm. This is what I want to do with Rastogi—kill him slowly. But I don’t think they’d let me.
How can I tell them that I want to feel blood on my hands? A lot of blood. I want to feel life leaving a body. But I’m done with animals. I want to do the same to a human now. Is that too much to ask from life? They always told me I could do anything, that they would do anything for me. I can buy anything I want. I want them to bring me a human to see how it feels to kill. They have so much money; it shouldn’t be difficult. Should I ask them? I don’t know.
15 January 1990
Abba is coming back from his trip today. He’s going to lock me up again. It’s not even possible to go out and meet anyone. Just because I jokingly beat Rahul yesterday doesn’t mean I wanted to kill him. I don’t understand why my parents think that if I kill animals, I’ll kill my friends too.
I just wanted to see how it feels to see him bleed. Rahul is a good friend, and I think he understands what I’m going through. He didn’t resist at all. I told him. I asked him. He tried to look shocked, but I knew deep inside he was happy that I wanted to beat him. It doesn’t matter if he told me so or not. I know him. I know he’s a good friend, and if I ask him, he’ll be happy to take another beating.
Should I sneak out today? I don’t know why Rastogi wants me to write how I feel, as if I’m going to show him what I write. He said he’d like to read what I write. I’m not going to do that. He can think whatever he wants. This journal will remain with me. I know he wants to change me, but I don’t want to be changed.
The sessions with him are incredibly dull. He talks about getting rid of my urges. What the hell? Why would I get rid of these urges? It’s better to satisfy them. Rastogi doesn’t know how warm blood feels on the hands; otherwise, he’d encourage me to keep killing, even if I only get the chance to kill animals.
The other day, when I killed my neighbor’s cat, the screams were loud at first, but they stopped forever in a few minutes. For the first time, I strangled something. It didn’t take long for that little bastard to stop struggling. For a few moments, it felt like it was Rashmi, my neighbor’s daughter. Whenever I see her, her soft neck invites me to crush it. But I can’t. I can’t kill a person. It would ruin my fun. So I killed her cat.
Her beloved bastard cat always growled at me when it saw me. I don’t know what the problem with these pets is. Why can’t they stay quiet around me? And yes, when I’m not killing animals, I can always beat up a few boys at school. It’s always fun to see them bleed and run for their lives.
List of Chapters:
- Chapter 1 – How It All Started
- Chapter 2 – The Opening of the Case
- Chapter 3 – The Raid Was an Eye-Opener
- Chapter 4 – The Horror Was Worse Than We Thought
- Chapter 5 – The Birth of a Serial Killer
- Chapter 6 – Kaal’s First Kill
- Chapter 7 – The Aftermath of Parents’ Death
- Chapter 8 – Shifting to a New House
- Chapter 9 – ‘Demolish it, rebuild it’ – The first step towards the haunting society
© Lekhak Anurag. Any unauthorised reproduction, personal or commercial, without permission is prohibited. For reproduction or commercial use of the story, please ping me on mailme[at]lekhakanurag.com.
Disclaimer: All the stories under #StorySutra are works of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locations, or persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The author does not intend to malign any individual, group, or organisation.
